Fixed attention on screens is hijacking a generation’s childhood and well-being en masse. Sure, there are benefits to technology. However, the issue isn’t whether this generation has enough exposure to modern technology; it’s whether they have enough exposure to real life.
Anyone who spends any time with children and teens—parents, grandparents, teachers, neighbors—can see that there is a cost to the minutes and hours our children are allowed to give away to the digital world each day.
Enumerating the countless, well-documented negative effects of kids’ screen time is fodder for another article. If you are concerned about a child in your life, here are five smart ways to limit their screen time.
Hold Off
If you are in the fortunate position of not having handed over a tablet or phone or computer to your children, count your blessings and hold the line. The best defense is a smart offense, and the best offense is not flippantly providing them with an open portal to a digital world filled with strategists and algorithms that aim expertly at monopolizing their attention and tempting them endlessly with tiny hits of dopamine.
The gift of being free of this burden for as long as possible can allow for more fresh air and sunshine, more real-life interaction, more creativity, more exercise, more books, more play, and more precious boredom. They can hold onto their innocence, their spirit, their optimism, and their capacity to dream. If you can, hold off. There are countless parents who wish they had.
Reverse Course
Once the cat is out of the bag, it can be very difficult to put it back in—but not impossible. Consider embarking on a week-long or even month-long digital detox as a family.
If you feel your kids need phones for safety, consider a “dumb” phone to replace the smartphone. Make it so computer use is limited to only necessity (such as mandatory schoolwork) and is performed in a shared space. Reduce television time to a movie night as a family once a week.
All other times should be screen-free. Depending on how strong the addiction has become, this might be very challenging at first, but over time, it will get easier. After a while, you’ll notice your children returning to their screen-free selves. It may be difficult, but the rewards are worth the effort.
Screen-free activities encourage collaborative problem-solving, laughter, and meaningful conversation. (David Prado Perucha/Shutterstock)
Teach Your Children Well
If there’s no getting around the regular use of digital devices, talk about what these devices are for and what they are not for. Draw a line between using them as a tool for information and creativity versus a crutch, a distraction, and an escape.
Encourage real-life versions of every so-called benefit these devices deliver: Get information from books, enjoy social interaction in person, draw pictures on paper, and watch videos or movies together as a family. Celebrate the simple joys of real life and downplay the temptations of the digital landscape.
Model the Behavior You Wish to See
While open and continuous dialogue that expands over time in conjunction with your children’s growth is important, modeling your own healthy relationship with digital technology is even more important.
Audit your own use of technology. How many times a day are you picking up your phone? Are you wasting your time on social media? Are you sacrificing attention you could be giving to your family in favor of an endless stream of 30-second videos? What do your children witness when they see you staring into a screen? Do you wish you could reduce your own screen time?
Establish healthy practices family-wide. Teach your children to be masters of their technological tools, rather than allowing the tools to master them. Keep talking. Keep reflecting. Keep improving.
Parents who model healthy technology habits teach children by example. (Nastyaofly/Shutterstock)
Set and Enforce Boundaries
It’s critical that you set strict boundaries and uphold them. You might set the rule that digital devices (phones, tablets, computers, and televisions) can only be used and stored in common spaces in the household and never in bedrooms. You may define limited times or even days when access to these devices is allowed. You might hold guests in your home to the standard that devices are to be stored in a central location. You might limit the apps, websites, and content portals that are allowed to be accessed at all. You might delete as many apps as possible, leaving only the bare minimum. You might go through the privacy settings on every device and set everything to the strictest level.
Set the standards for your household and hold your ground in upholding them.
Young children who are afforded a childhood free of digital devices will grow to have great advantages over their technology-addicted peers. The later you can wait to introduce digital devices, the better. Though difficult, you can reverse course. As your children get older, teach them through words and deeds to remain masters of their technological tools, not slaves to them.
