One of my all-time favorite songs is “Head Full of Doubt” by The Avett Brothers.
A line early in the song declares, “Decide what to be and go be it.” That lyric has stuck with me for years and has become one of my life’s mantras.
The reason that I was so moved by those lyrics was that they hit me at a time in my life when I was feeling powerless and weak. It was as if the world was tossing me around and leaving me no choice as to what to make of it.
Of course, that was an illusion. Every one of us exercises incredible agency. We may not be power brokers, kingmakers, or robber barons, but we possess the power to be the kind of person we want to be.
While we can’t control the circumstances and actions of those around us, we can control ourselves. That’s enough for me.
The Avett Brothers’ lyrics forced me to grapple with the kind of person I wanted to be in this world and think long and hard about what was stopping me from being that person. I share the vision for my life below to inspire you to decide what you want to do with yours.
7 Things I Strive to Be
1. A Man of Faith and Wisdom
Being of faith represents one who is grounded in something bigger than oneself and loyal to a cause that is not theirs. That’s the kind of person I want to be so that others around me can draw inspiration from the direction and object of my gaze.
2. A Thoughtful Husband
At the end of my life, what few things will matter? One thing for sure is that I will want to have made my wife happy. She is the person in this world who means more to me than anything, and I hope to see from her eyes that I did not disappoint her with my love.
3. A Gentle and Present Father
Before having children, I could not have imagined that there was so much room left in my heart for loving other people. That might seem kind of corny, but it feels so deeply real to me. I want my children to feel loved and appreciated more than anything else.
4. Deeply Curious About the World
One of the best ways that I know how to show appreciation for the gift of life that I’ve been given is to study and marvel at its fascinating depth. There are enough things to learn to fill a million lifetimes, and I will only scratch the surface. That thought somehow brings me joy—as if life’s a wonderful, ongoing story that I’ll never get to the end of.
5. Full of Adventure and Willing to Take Risks
Play it safe and stick to the script? That’s not the life I envision for myself! I have a contrarian streak that makes me feel most alive when I’m pushing against the normal ways of being and striking out in a different direction. I like that quality about myself and plan to lean into it with all I’ve got.
6. Generous and Loyal to My True Friends
I’ve been blessed with more than what I need, and so I hope that my life will reflect a generosity of spirit to everyone I come across—especially so to my friends. Even more than material possessions, I hope to give them my loyalty, which is to say, my friendship through thick and thin.
7. A Friend of the Weak and Powerless
The idea of goodness is deeply attractive. I want to know what is good and pursue it. I can’t think of anything better than being a friend to the friendless and an advocate for those less powerful. More than giving a hand up and feeling good about myself, I want to be in a relationship with those who have nothing to give, which to me is friendship at its purest.
It may come across as if I’m painting a pretty picture of myself for you to admire, but that’s not what I’m trying to do. I want to hold up ideas for what I aim for in life and encourage you to do the same—and then go do it.
Correction: A previous version of this article misspelled the name of The Avett Brothers in one instance. The Epoch Times regrets the error.
